05 August 2008


Here is another update on Motoko-chan. We talked on the phone not long after her packages arrived.
Motoko-chan was born in 1930 (so she is 78, not 60-something as I originally thought). She lived in Hiroshima when the bomb dropped. All she had to say about that was "it was terrible". I'll bet. Then they shipped her off to the countryside in the Kansai province.
Piecing that together with some other things, like the fact that she has only been in the States for 14 years, and was in England before that in "a sanitarium" (at some point), I would gather that living through the bombing of Hiroshima was rather horrible and life changing. Yet, here she is. In love with America and Americans. Go figure.
That would explain Motoko-chan's (if it is acceptable for me to be so familiar with her) poor English. My gosh, she came here when she was 64. If I had to speak in a new language and learn it well at the age of 64 -- well! Should I be so spry.
What humbles me is that she chose me to connect with after all these years. Thirteen hours on a plane. That's all. And she decided I was one she could connect with. Am I the only "young" one who would take the time to listen to and speak with her? I know she has friends, or at least acquaintances, at the Senior Center in the town in which she lives.
I'm scared of the responsibility. Each time I "collect" a person, I seem to let the ball drop and I know it disappoints them. It disappoints me.
So, what do I do with the responsibility she's passed on to me? What about the futon and the other items? Why does this haunt me? (Okay, I know why -- rhetorical question.)

I still have a honking big box in my [now dry] basement and I just don't know what to do with it!

04 August 2008

Waiting with my puppy

Okay. This is it. Why do we place such importance on the arrival of someone? Because we have a connection to them and want to reconnect. Not the umbilicus but the life, the relationship, the friendship, the HUGS.
Hammering out relationship with one's adult offspring is like walking a mine field blindfolded. Once a mother, always a mother. It just won't go away, no matter how hard one tries. On the one hand, a certain amount of mothering is expected, if not required. On the other hand, a certain amount of restraint is required, if not expected.
We are expecting our daughter to be in country from her two year stint in Japan. Countdown is down to hours, not days, now. Except, we can't pick her up for a couple more days. (!) Okay. Time to tell the mother to chill. She's an adult. She has adult relationships. Good thing she's independent. Has a life outside Mom and Dad. WAH. WAH WAH. WAAAAAHHH.
I know that we will drive her crazy within 3 days of her living in our house. She will drive us crazy within 10 days. (The parent factor extends the crazy factor by 66%, evidently. Look it up.) The only one who won't drive her crazy will be the dog. And he will, eventually. Drive her crazy. He's just so NEEDY. Cute, but needy.
As the countdown continues, and my fingernails dwindle, all I can do is wait. And wonder - will that parent factor actually extend the crazy factor by 66% or is it much, much lower?
We'll see, won't we?